This is a further installment of things to do to help you feel young. Please try them out.
#4. Tell long stories that ultimately have no point or jokes that aren’t funny. How many among us of have listened to a small child try to tell a story or a joke? It usually doesn’t go well, and let’s face it: if we laugh it’s because we have no souls and we are laughing at the poor kid’s inability to realize their failure. And we continue to listen because we do not want to crush the child or to inhibit the fledging creative spirit growing inside of them. In telling a pointless story or humorless joke, we embrace the wide eyed naiveté of youth while at the same time giving other adults that precious opportunity to build patience and self control while someone is wasting their time.
#5. Loudly (and poorly) sing songs that were popular when you were school aged in an inappropriate situation. The added enjoyment of this is that most (97%) of the songs that were popular in your youth weren’t that good. So when you walk into a mostly quiet office and start singing ‘I’ll tell you what I want, what I really, really want. I tell you what I want, what I really, really want. I really, really, really, really wanna zigga zigga ah!’, you are irritating on multiple levels.
#6. Dancing anywhere. Little kids dance all the time. Sometimes they’re good; most of the time they are uncoordinated and move like Michelle Tanner on muscle relaxers. Doesn’t matter how well you move, take that move and bust it wide open, anywhere. And I don’t just mean at places where people are already dancing, like at a wedding reception or on the set of High School Musical. I mean ANYWHERE. Here is a list of suggestions to help you in case your imagination is atrophied from disuse:
-Wal-Mart
-Dentist office
-H and R Block
-Emergency room
-Street corners
-Funerals…Wait.
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